My husband and I probably have the worst combination of ADD, OCD, and artistic ability possible. When the stars aligned to bring us together it was the most perfect match the universe could create. We can take an idea and bounce it back and forth between our heads with barely a word, just a deeper connection. We both have very expensive tastes. We will pick out the same thing and know without looking it was the most expensive version available, just because we both liked it. We will get identical visions of what we need to do on a simple task but somehow they will morph into insanely large construction projects. Like one time we thought it would be a great idea to get rid of the muddy carpet in the front entry way, maybe switch it to vinyl tile, just something easier to clean with kids. 4 days and a couple thousand dollars later we had a beautiful hardwood floor, a new door, new trim, keyless entry, Victorian carpet stair runners, and a custom made shoe rack. You know, just a simple quick project.
This winter we decided that the ugly “30-years-of-coffee-and-a-cigarette brown” walls and poorly prepped “hooker-red” kitchen cabinets needed to go. We started right away by attaching new decorative trim to the STILL red cabinets, because you know, why not do the exact thing we complain about daily and start the cabinets without properly stripping and priming them. PPPSSSHHH! That’s only important when other people are doing the work. So now let’s strip the “back-seat-of-a-70’s-Nova-scarlet” nail polish off with a fun obstacle course to work around. It’s a bonding experience really. Maybe it would be easier if we did the drawers first since we can take them down to the garage.
Sweet, now that those are all ready for the last few coats of paint why don’t we just check on the price on that flooring we picked out. (We had agreed that we would put in hardwood floors before trying to house train a second puppy HAHAHAHA!!! Allee was adorable and my Biggie Smalls needed his own therapy puppy to deal with his grieving mommy) Look! The exact wood we had picked out is on clearance and they have just enough to do the entire upstairs! WE MUST BUY IT NOW!!! Aaaaaaand if we are going to put down hardwood floors we really should paint the upper level before that so we don’t ruin them right away. Sure, why not?
Now our fresh cabinets have turned into; decorative cabinet trim, chalk paint, new knife rack, hardwood floors, new color on the walls (changed twice), new floor trim, new drywall (don’t use command strips!) new ceiling fan blades (duh it has to match now), a new bannister (the 80’s butt-plug had to go!), new rugs, new door trim, new door knobs, a chalkboard, new home stereo setup, new back, new knees, new respect for the guys on HGTV and a partridge in a pear tree.
I have to give some credit to all the help we have gotten. The girls contributed slave labor by pulling tack strips and staples from the subfloor. (Even in their Father Daughter Ball gowns) Gazzy has found a way to let us know when EVERY surface is still wet. (A few shirts have been sacrificed. Apparently “don’t touch anything, I just painted” means rub your body sideways down the hall or wipe the dust off the bannister) Timberly and Micha have come by every day after work to help lay flooring and clean. (Fairly sure this is why I can’t keep friends. At least Micha is awesome at cleaning, I bribe him with ice cream) The underpants gnomes have been organizing and moving every tool that Travis sets down into a place that only Rya would think of. (At least I feel useful since I’m always finding the “missing” tool) Mr Biggie Smalls and Allee Sioux have been phenomenal at picking up scrap wood for us! (A few time we have turned around to pick up the piece we just cut only to see it being drug under the kitchen table by a pup half its size into a bed it has no chance of fitting in) I didn’t realize dogs could be so helpful in constructions projects. Allee has been licking every paint stir stick clean (even the ones still in the paint bucket) and her puppy bed looks like a prison stash. Complete with chewed down shank-spoons and boards with nails in them. (I literally cannot go 30 minutes without shaking my head and grumbling “you are worse than a toddler” but oh that face she makes when she rolls on her back and gives me the huge puppy bull-doggie smile! SQUEE!!!)
And guess what? We still haven’t finished those drawers! They are still sitting in the garage primed and ready to go, but the upstairs looks fabulous!!! At least it did until my sweet little puppy-angels had a near death experience. Not to point fingers (Travis) but someone (Travis) didn’t put the puppy gate back up before leaving to run errands. When he returned the brand spanking new white trim was chewed up right at the top of the stairs. They are only alive because they are fast and small and really good at hiding when they mess something up on purpose. And right after complaining that I put out new rugs even though we had more cutting and sanding to do, someone (Travis) knocked over my glass of red wine! (You have no idea how happy I am that it wasn’t me, little secret, it’s ALWAYS me) I think no one is to blame except for those darn underpants gnomes. Those things are so destructive.
My hubby pointed out that I forgot to mention the 1500 mile road trip to Minnesota in a blizzard that happened halfway through the week of remodeling
Did anyone else know that French bulldogs are part beaver? And part skunk?
Now my dreams of owning Frenchies, beavers and skunks have all come true!! How do I get a fox next………